# Warning: Idiot Alert!!!!!



## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

Giving you guys a heads up, there will be an Idiot asshole from Texas coming to "boat" next week through the 1st week of June. I would like everybody to be alert and if you see his dumb ass smoking weed, please have him arrested. The state of texas and all the boaters residing there would be ever greatful, infact, there may be a reward for it. In addition to this he plans on running clear creek including rigormortis. His boating skills are no match for clear creek and I would like to give you a heads up on that one as well. So if you see this idiot, just call the cops or something.


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

Is his name Grif?


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

haha, no, but he follows the same pattern except the girlfriend would be his butt buddy richard. Hes more concerned with smoking weed than he is running the rivers


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

and if you read the paddle texas forums, which i doubt anybody will, you would find out why we want this theiving, lying, cheatin pothead arrested.


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

Don't knock smoking weed and paddling just because your Texas buddy can't handle it...


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

He aint my buddy. No self respecting paddler would like him.


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

You still shouldn't encourage people to report puffing the ganja!


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

Hmmm, what else, I mean you can't exactly get him arrested for being a douche bag. Any ideas, feel free to act on them.


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## gapers (Feb 14, 2004)

You're all gapers in Texas,far as we're concerned.

You leave the weed out of this


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

Well, thats nice, but I don't really care what you think.


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

You know what's black and shiny and looks good on a Texan?

My car!


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## shady (Jun 7, 2006)

F--ing Texans!


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

HAHAHA I just looked at this paddletexas.com board! Screw Mountain Buzz, I'll be on Paddle Texas from now on! It's just a bunch of idiots talking about each other's sisters and how they boat once a year! 

Stay in Texas Texans.


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## lotsawater (Nov 18, 2003)

Listen Jack!

There is an idiot alert, and its you. Police your own douche bags, we have enough up here. Have fun in Houston, please stay there!


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

Aight, heres the deal. Bad judgement on my part. I put the post up partly to warn, but mostly to spite a person. Yeah, it was dumb. Sorry for bringing this shit to you guys. Ya'll don't need our bullshit. I'm not trying to be the friendly *** from Texas, just realizing something wrong and apologizing, not something texans are know for. So, sorry guys, bad mistake.


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

Here are a few reasons why Texans grate on people in the mountains:

Every day a Texan gets lost in Colorado and wastes valuable SAR resources. The cause is not just ignorance, it is arrogance.

I can predict when I will see a Texas plate almost every time by the erratic and inconsistent driving.

Yellow hummers are retarded.

The lady who ran into me at Breckenridge and caused me a major shoulder injury was from Texas. 

A majority of Texans elected G.W. 

Many of us have worked in the hospitality/recreation/resort/tourism business for a while. The Texans that travel here really do act like they own the place. The people of Colorado (and I'm talking about mountain folk, not necessarily all front rangers) are a people that are kind, mellow, and tend to tread lightly. The Texans are generally harsh and abrasive. It's not uncommon for them to fight in our chill ski-town bars or harass the cool girls living and working up here. It's not just not fitting in, but it is a general inconsiderateness that we experience all too often.

I think the deepest reason though, for Coloradans to hate Texans (or at least many of the ones who travel here) is that they try to make you feel second class in your own backyard. They flaunt their money and make the people who are in the service industry feel like servants. 

So yeah, when a Texan comes on to a local message board and tries to create animosity toward another Texan that he has beef with because of some shit that went down in Texas everyone thinks "God, I sure hate Texans."

I'm sure you're not all bad.


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## Grif (May 21, 2008)

Yeah!


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## kclowe (May 25, 2004)

*Keystone?*

Hey Jack,
Do all Texans go to Keystone? Just wondering. They must do a lot of advertising there. I've probably run into your friend.
I do have to thank you for the warning, but if we don't have a name or a description, how the heck do we tell you guys apart? You all sound the same!
(Before you get mad, know that I have a pretty bad accent myself and I'm just poking fun).
You should come up here yourself and do some boating. Nobody from here is going to call the law on your "buddy". However, if we knew who he was, maybe we'd let him swim a little longer in the Poudre. Now that's a lesson!
Sounds like the "extra curricular activities" aren't his problem. Sounds like he's just a jerk. We deal with that in our own way, and it's a lot more fun.

Kim


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## Phillips (Feb 19, 2004)

Hey Man. . . I'm not from Texas  



kayakjack said:


> Giving you guys a heads up, there will be an Idiot asshole from Texas coming to "boat" next week through the 1st week of June. I would like everybody to be alert and if you see his dumb ass smoking weed, please have him arrested. The state of texas and all the boaters residing there would be ever greatful, infact, there may be a reward for it. In addition to this he plans on running clear creek including rigormortis. His boating skills are no match for clear creek and I would like to give you a heads up on that one as well. So if you see this idiot, just call the cops or something.


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## peak (Apr 7, 2006)

randaddy and kayakjack: wyoming and texas are equally stupid and backwards...


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## SSOWDEN (Apr 29, 2004)

Phillips said:


> Hey Man. . . I'm not from Texas


That's not what your mom said when I saw her waiting with your stash at the bottom of rigor. Was that your t-caynon wrapped on black rock with the "hook em horns" sticker?
If your not playing in the band this weekend, we're going to do something mellow on the ark.


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## yetigonecrazy (May 23, 2005)

Randaddy said:


> Many of us have worked in the hospitality/recreation/resort/tourism business for a while. The Texans that travel here really do act like they own the place. The people of Colorado (and I'm talking about mountain folk, not necessarily all front rangers) are a people that are kind, mellow, and tend to tread lightly. The Texans are generally harsh and abrasive. It's not uncommon for them to fight in our chill ski-town bars or harass the cool girls living and working up here. It's not just not fitting in, but it is a general inconsiderateness that we experience all too often.
> 
> I think the deepest reason though, for Coloradans to hate Texans (or at least many of the ones who travel here) is that they try to make you feel second class in your own backyard. They flaunt their money and make the people who are in the service industry feel like servants.



BINGO!!!!!!

I work in the service industry in Crested Butte, and its not just Texans, its Oklahomans, Georgians, Missourians, Floridians...But it's all the same, they come here and just act like it's their home and that they've lived here for years, and when they get their shit told, they try to flaunt their money and throw it at their problems.

Nobody makes me feel second class in the town I was born and grew up in, I have and will again go off on tourists and let them know where they stand. Sometimes its the only way to get them off the horse they ride into town on.


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## ritatheraft (May 22, 2007)

http://www.telluridenews.com/homepage/x1925663146

Texans starting an avalanche


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## acetomato (May 6, 2006)

We love Texans here. They save us money on avi bombs.


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## Randaddy (Jun 8, 2007)

_"randaddy and kayakjack: wyoming and texas are equally stupid and backwards..."_

And Palisade is a progressive and magical place? What a dump! 

Wyoming is bad ass. Big mountains, less tourists, old school politics, great schools, clean air, and the best sunsets around. I'm proud. Wyoming is nothing like Texas!


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## Gary E (Oct 27, 2003)

"wyoming and texas are equally stupid and backwards" Peak, don't go throwin Wyoming in the mix with texASS or we're gonna shove an AT up your ass chunder style.


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## craporadon (Feb 27, 2006)

Wyoming kicks ass. It's Craporado that has such a bad east infection it oozes out and infects the respectable Rocky Mountain states like Wyoming, Montana, Idaho, New Mexico and Utah. Not that they don't have their own issues, Utah is full of Utards, Idaho has Idahookers and Wyoming has Gary E. At least Craporado has Chad Dyson, The Real Deal Owner of Colorado.


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## TakemetotheRiver (Oct 4, 2007)

I agree that I don't want to feel second class in my hometown... but I love showing them down the river and telling them the history of the town I'm proud of- and if they're assholes- they get a smile and a much closer look at the river. They get to really feeeel that hometown goodness, ya know?



yetigonecrazy said:


> BINGO!!!!!!
> Nobody makes me feel second class in the town I was born and grew up in, I have and will again go off on tourists and let them know where they stand. Sometimes its the only way to get them off the horse they ride into town on.


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## ripdam (May 2, 2006)

Randaddy said:


> Many of us have worked in the hospitality/recreation/resort/tourism business for a while. The Texans that travel here really do act like they own the place. The people of Colorado (and I'm talking about mountain folk, not necessarily all front rangers) are a people that are kind, mellow, and tend to tread lightly. The Texans are generally harsh and abrasive. It's not uncommon for them to fight in our chill ski-town bars or harass the cool girls living and working up here. It's not just not fitting in, but it is a general inconsiderateness that we experience all too often.
> 
> I think the deepest reason though, for Coloradans to hate Texans (or at least many of the ones who travel here) is that they try to make you feel second class in your own backyard. They flaunt their money and make the people who are in the service industry feel like servants.


Even though all of this is true, one thing that you have to remember about the tourists from Texas is that without them, arrogant or not, many of us in the mountain town service businesses would not have the jobs that support our outdoor lifestyles. Not taking a side, just making a point.


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## deepstroke (Apr 3, 2005)

Kayakjackoff, this Texan finds your post appalling and disgraceful. Go home and wash the shame off of yourself. You get no credit for apologizing to Mountainbuzz, you should apologize to the guy you called out. It's no wonder the Asshole Texan stereotype thrives.


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

I'm pretty sure that youre part of the problem too deepstroke, and I find it funny that while you would never talk the way you do in real life, you do it over the internet. And if you did, you would be a bigger asshole than me.


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## pan-am (May 23, 2008)

Kayakjack stick to the Huston flat water ,your in way over your head .
What have you paddled in the last cupple of months ?


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

In case you heaven't noticed these people don't want our stupid shit here, so go back to ptex and flame me there, stop carrying it on here.


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

and do yourself a favor and learn to spell


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## COUNT (Jul 5, 2005)

No way, man. We love it. Now we don't have to rag on the Texans because they're doing it to themselves.


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## pan-am (May 23, 2008)

jagg off you little rooster sucking beotch


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## Trouble (May 23, 2008)

Well fuck yeah..let's put another texan in the mix...God Bless Goerge Bush...ahahhaa....

Hey Grover..That's Couple..not Cupple..
Kyakjack..do you even paddle?
DS..hahahhaha...what the fuck chuck..lets go paddle some flat hot water..

So you bastards like to flame Texas....hmm..And why again aren't you paddling?


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## kayakjack (May 20, 2008)

Yeah, Tony, I do paddle a cupple of times a month, but since theres nothing around exceptin hildago, its a long ass drive to get to the water. And guess what, you've met me before. Wierd right?


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## pan-am (May 23, 2008)

and they kissed


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## EarlTheSquirrel (May 23, 2008)

Hey tony, you are a ***. KayakJack you are retarded for coming on here and posting shit about me. I own this bitch and you come in here acting like a fucking asshole and embarrassing me in front of my crew. Spin on it Jack. I'll smoke some weed and shot gun it in your face. Tony, you are a failure and your store sucks.


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