# Those Tubing Pictures are sweeeeet!



## BobbyWalker (Jul 19, 2005)

Those tubing pictures were great! I can't wait for you to post more of them. Keep them comming. Oh wait, actually they sucked my right nut.


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## TheKid (Aug 25, 2004)

what the hell are tubing pictures doing in the creeking gallery. Thats almost offensive.


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## mankster (Jul 6, 2005)

ya, seriously. one would have been more than sufficient. the photo edited ones a few weeks ago weren't that good either. You tubing biatches need to start you own site. You are clogging up the server with some crap. frenchy, kick his ass.


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## Dave Frank (Oct 14, 2003)

90 seconds of my life I will never get back.


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## prozoned (Jun 17, 2005)

LETS KICK THE TUBER'S ASSES

theres way more of us than ther are them


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## BobbyWalker (Jul 19, 2005)

I know the hoser who put the tubing pics up was hoping to get a rise out of us. It worked. Seriously, don't use Mountainbuzz as your own personal gallery, you bloody wanker.


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## sward (Dec 14, 2003)

I go to the gallery section with great expectation to see homegrown CO kayak porn, not gapers on tubes. Frenchy, I am all up for freedom of speech, but those pics hurt my brain.

This entire tuber movement is kind of lame as well. I thought the vid posted recently was a little funny and novel, but like those pics, a huge waste of resources and time. Test out Darwin's theory on your own time and site.

Steve.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Did anyone else notice that whoever posted those tooooobing pics wasted almost an entire *hour* of their lives doing so?? AN HOUR. They spent an hour-- an hour they could've spent on a river, on a trail, doing good things in the community, taking a beginners' kayaking class (had to throw that in there  )-- trying to make some kind of point.....?

....now, what that point is, I have yet to figure out. But I still can't believe someone would waste that much time trying to post a handful of pics??


(disclaimer: yeah, I probably waste an hour or so here every now and then, too, but that's just because I'm dicking around here at my crappy, 10-hr-a-day desk job. I still have to find some joy in life if I'm going to be tethered to a desk all day, even if it is just _reading_ about what I'd rather be out there doing...!  )


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## zbaird (Oct 11, 2003)

maybe you guys can waste some more time bitching. bitch bitch bitch.


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## bouldrmatty (Aug 9, 2004)

OTT, show some restraint.. GEEEEZZ

The photos arent even of marginal quality... I guess if you are trolling, then mission accomplished. 

One crapy photo would of been fine, but a dozen out of focus, poor light balance, crappy cropping (fore and aft ground)... etc etc


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## DanOrion (Jun 8, 2004)

Noting that the there were no helmets on the tube riders, I think this will work its self out. Thank God for natural selection.


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## l-dot (Dec 20, 2003)

DanOrion said:


> Thank God for natural selection.


Darwin and God finally team up. And to kill tubers none the less. It's about time.


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

Was there a boob on that one out of focus picture of the girl? That is a girl, right? If that's the case, then the most egregious insult here is taunting me with an out of focus boob.


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)

Props to the anything but tubers pics. Them shits were so lame, they were'nt even decent pics. Dont taint the creeking gallery with that filth.


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## griz (Sep 19, 2005)

looks like they have been flushed down the toilet anyway. 

unbind your panties, gentlemen.


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)

Panties in a bunch?? Way to spoil your first post griz. Take that shit to guberbuzz.com, good riddance.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

I don't know, FLOW.... he could be right-on with me.... you know, the one chick posting in this thread and all... 

Let me check.... hmm-- do you guys think thong underwear technically count as "bunched"??


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)

your a naughty girl, pm me that pic already. :wink: :wink:


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

No way...post that shit. Just make sure it's not out of focus.


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## griz (Sep 19, 2005)

glad to hear there is a thong wearing girl on this site...judging by flowtorches post and everyone elses I thought i had stumbled onto a Gay Kayaker Forum.


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)

Good one BSoE!

Griz, quit frontin like your all about seeing newbys thongs, If you cant tell I dont think shes your type, even though she hasn't got her roll :wink: l, I think it's safe to say she likes kayakers. And I believe you were the one that said "unbind your panties" (extremely gay)referring to your fondness of hazy, out of focus, shirtless tubers...and on a kayaking/rafting/ski forum no less. Now you tell me where that foul material fits in here? So take your gay taint to another forum, the hetero-boaters are trying to see newbys thong.

Here, I'll help ya find the right one: www.pinoypride.org


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## griz (Sep 19, 2005)

i can't muster the courage to click on the "wood at the m-wave" thread. I'm sure you guys post your sorid details of your interludes on the banks of the streams here too...


"wood at the m-mave"


"You look good in that tight wetsuit,Flowtorch", kayakben says trying to flirt abit.

"Is that a throwbag in your pants or are you just happy to see me" flowtorch flirts back....


...i could go on but i need to vomit.


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

LOL! That shit was funny.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Not so sure I like where this thread is going, so I'll throw this one out there, too:


It's red.
Did I mention it was red earlier??

didn't think so... 

And FLOW... play nice on the roll comments: it's not that I don't have a roll, it's just that, um, it's a little less than 100% reliable!


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## DanOrion (Jun 8, 2004)

This is just down to name calling.

GRIZPaddlesaSIT ON TOParoundLakeDillon :shock:


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## gapers (Feb 14, 2004)

Haha, thats good shit, Mr. Orion.

Newby-make with the thong pics and you'll always have a basement to stay at here in the LC (larimer County).


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)

Haaha, was that supposed to be funny griz. Thanks for nailin the coffin shut on yourself. 

On with the conversation:

Newby was wearing a red thong.

Me: what color is that bra

Newby: Red, straight outta fredricks of Hollywood, you like that?

Me: You do it for me everytime girl, wanna go around the corner and watch me piss all over myself

Newby: Ooooh, hell yes, that line gets me everytime.

WARNING: Dont any of you turds be stealing my lines, except you griz. You can use that on the fellas all you like


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## mankster (Jul 6, 2005)

can someone tell me what is going on here?
I can't follow: tubers=gay, newby=tease, flow=freak.
is that right?


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## griz (Sep 19, 2005)

yes, correct. and i think it's safe to add: mankster=slow


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Prol'ly so, Mank... 

You know how it goes, though-- us gals have enough to deal with out there OTR that we can't do much more with you boys than tease you mercilessly.  Last thing anyone wants to end up is some sort of river ho! LOL (or even worse: the chick-who's-a-kayaker-just-because-she-dates-kayakers) :roll: 

Gapers: One of my best friends lives in the Tech Ctr, and I've got some old friends out in Estes Park for backup, but thanks anyway for the basement offer-- there's nothing that'll entice a gal to post half-nekkid pics of herself on the internet quite like offering her a "tour" of your cold, wet, moldy basement!! Gee, could I sleep between the kayak and the soggy neoprene, or maybe I could just push the dog off his mildewy mat in the corner for a good nite's rest instead?? You charmer you.... LOL!!  


BTW, is it just me, or does anyone else get the feeling Griz's last post wasn't the *first* time he's written this kind of, um... prose?


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

I think Nube is actually some middle aged pervert, sitting in his mom's basement searching the web right now for a jpeg of some hottie in a red thong that "she" can post of "herself". Call me cinical.


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## durangoskiier (Sep 23, 2004)

Who cares, I still want to see it!


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

BSoE,
Would you settle for a picture of my *pink* Jackson instead??



(why does that still sound dirty?? LOL!)


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)

Freak=right you are

Alright, I didn't wanna share this with some of you unoriginal humps but here it is, the inspiration for my sexual dialogue with newby. Newb, I know you'll enjoy this. Lots of good entertainment for you guys at work too, read on:

http://www.quq.dk/cybersex.htm

I like the "I put on my robe and wizard hat one"


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## Hammer (Sep 9, 2005)

I'm with BSOE... Newby's always inserting "himself" (did I just say that...) in posts, thread jacking off, screaming, "I need attention, I'm trying to get down to Key West, but poor me I'm stuck in this basement without any attention or lotion for that matter!"

Someone should start a poll, "Would a hot chic really need to say she's hot on a kayaking forum?"...


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

Nube...only if it's well kept. tehe.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Yep, you guys are onto me.... except I really *am* a woman. Just a 327 lb one with bad hair, bad teeth, bad skin, social interaction issues, irritable bowel syndrome, flatulence problems, stringy hair, a femullet, and pigeon toes.... oh, who doesn't paddle and prefers toobing, too, BTW. 

I hope you're happy now, Hammer.... forcing my hand to reveal all my dirty secrets to the world like this! And where the hell are you getting this "hot chick" reference? You mean the post from, what a month(???) ago where I was giving it back to BSoE after he catalogued all the reasons I might not consider relocating to his fair state? um, not sure that counts, buddy!


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## BobbyWalker (Jul 19, 2005)

You are all a bunch of wanker stains.


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

Yeah? Well...you sound English.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Actually BSoE, I don't think he's that (ahem) English:
if you google "Bobby Walker"/ kayak online, you get a hit for "P&E: The Gay Information Source for Key West Florida."


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

Oh...he's *that* kind of English.


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## caverdan (Aug 27, 2004)

This thread reminds me of a joke I once heard. It goes something like this.................


*Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly, it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too. *


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## griz (Sep 19, 2005)

you suck. 

so does your joke.


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## caverdan (Aug 27, 2004)

Ok, how about this one...............................

Two yakers paddle into a concrete wall.......... The one turns to the other and says, "Dam!" :shock:


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## griz (Sep 19, 2005)

pitiful. kill yourself.


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## caverdan (Aug 27, 2004)

Well.......since you insist..........one last joke for the night. :wink: 

A blonde walks by a travel agency and notices a sign in the window, "Cruise Special -- $99." 

She goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and says, "I'd like the $99 cruise special, please."

The agent grabs her, drags her into the back room, ties her to a large inner tube, then drags her out the back door and down the hill to Boulder creek, where he pushes her in and sends her floating down the creek.

A second blonde comes by a few minutes later, sees the sign, goes inside, lays her money on the counter, and asks for the $99 special. She, too, is tied to an inner tube and sent floating down the creek.

Drifting into stronger current, she eventually catches up with the first blonde. They float side-by-side for a while before the first blonde asks, "Do they serve refreshments on this cruise?" 


The second blonde replies, "They didn't last year. :?


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## kayakerssuckmyass (Sep 24, 2005)

*you yakers are being FUCKING LAME about this tubing shit!!!*

Man, to hate on tubers is to hate on yourselves. We just like to have fun in the same freezing waters you ball-less wetsuitwearin mother fuckers enjoy as well. :shock: Dont hate on tubing just cause we enjoy the same source of entertainment. Not to mention, we use our huge inflated bicepts to power our way through the puny lame waters you folks should dare to even attemp to call a river! 8) (come on just jokin here) Nope wont find any carbon fiber, super low restistant paddle on these boats. Sorry we dont have all the freshest gear.  Unfortunately, we are not human enough to understand how much cooler it is to ride on expensive items that are only rated by how neat and shiny they are.  Dont forget who you are, and what your doing out there on the water, and try to imagine that people try to enjoy the same rivers, for the same reasons you do. :!: Beyond that it, shouldnt matter what your ridin on. Sorry to flame at yas...but listen to yourselves..............FUCK!


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## mankster (Jul 6, 2005)

I think most of us accept tubers. Most of us probably accept any of our friends who 'come out'
This thread was about really, really bad pictures. If someone put really bad pictures of kayaking, I would make fun of them too.


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## tuberslickmysweatyballs (Sep 24, 2005)

*Re: you yakers are being FUCKING LAME about this tubing shit*



kayakerssuckmyass said:


> Man, to hate on tubers is to hate on yourselves. We just like to have fun in the same freezing waters you ball-less wetsuitwearin mother fuckers enjoy as well. :shock: Dont hate on tubing just cause we enjoy the same source of entertainment. Not to mention, we use our huge inflated bicepts to power our way through the puny lame waters you folks should dare to even attemp to call a river! 8) (come on just jokin here) Nope wont find any carbon fiber, super low restistant paddle on these boats. Sorry we dont have all the freshest gear.  Unfortunately, we are not human enough to understand how much cooler it is to ride on expensive items that are only rated by how neat and shiny they are.  Dont forget who you are, and what your doing out there on the water, and try to imagine that people try to enjoy the same rivers, for the same reasons you do. :!: Beyond that it, shouldnt matter what your ridin on. Sorry to flame at yas...but listen to yourselves..............FUCK!


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## TheKid (Aug 25, 2004)

I understand the love your fellow river user philosophy. We are all just having fun. Yes. But you guys preaching about loving the tubers have obviously never been playing in Golden, and been pushed out of the hole by some tuber. I realize this might not seem like a big deal to most of you. But when evertime you finish a move, and you look back up stream there is another tuber bearing down on you. You begin to develope a bit of a negative attitude towards tubers. And then there are the boogie boards who are most of the time are cool kids, but there are always a few rotten apples in that group. Just ask Brook about those kids. They take twenty minute rides, cut in line, and don't do shit. Hey but as long as they keep bringing there girl friends, I won't really give a shit. If you have never experienced these people then you really don't understand why there is this attitude towards them. So don't judge the rest of us for not really liking these people.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Hey Kid,
I see your CO toobers, and I RAISE you our SE variety.... here, if they're not morbidly obese, shirtless, tattooed with rebel flags, beer logos, illicit substance leaves, Harley Davidson insignia, or bad portraits of topless women and/ or they mammas (topless women who happen to be they mammas perhaps?), are half-toothless, either bald or sporting a mullet (BONUS = _permed_ mullets), clothed in JAMS or denim cutoffs, toting a cooler full of Natty Lite/ PBR/ BEAST in the cooler float they've cleverly rigged up behind them, and found travelling in packs (complete with toober larvae).... well, then they just don't count as REAL toobers! 
 

Extra points on toober coolness if:
a) you can get them to make disparaging comments about kayakers and/ or have them actually cast a fishhook/ line in your general direction (usually requires no antagonizing on your part-- generally a friendly, "hi, how's it going?" is enough to incite said response). 
b) you can get them on a tirade about George W. Bush or Christianity/ organized religion ("nice beltbuckle" usually does the trick)
c) they're singing (think drunken rendition of "sweet home alabama")
d) they call you by your given name: i.e. "you city-folk"
e) their version of "pushing you off a wave" looks more like roller-derby/ demolition-derby than someone trying to score style points (read: brute force theory-- they're a lot bigger brutes and weigh alot more than you and your friends....)
f) you can talk them into going over any drop exceeding 5' - 6' in height, without letting onto height of said river feature 
g) they make unsolicited comments and attempt mating rituals (speaking in a language primarily consisted of "babys" and "honeys" and other more colorful 4-letter vernacular) with blatant disregard for male paddlers in your party-- ADDITIONAL BONUS: you're actually invited back to their trailer, or offered a guided tour of the bed of their pickup truck ADDITIONAL additional BONUS: You're a male paddler yourself (aka, "the banjo theory")

I'm sure I'll think of more.... but the catch here is, annoying as our toobers may be (and they could take a prize for it most of the time), we love 'em just the same.... *why*? Because of the inherent *entertainment value*.... I'll tell you this much: if a guy and his friend walk up to the Ocoee put-in with an inflatable alligator and an inflatable killer whale, ask me about lines, and make crystal clear their intent to run the Middle that day-- I'm not going ot get all territorial about it AT ALL. Instead, I'd wish them the best, run back to my car for a camcorder, and make sure my (still) camera has enough film to catch the carnage all the way down from Grumpy's to that last nasty little pourover below Powerhouse Ledge.... and we'd prolly even tell 'em to head left on it (read: the _bad_ line) when they get there. 

As long as they're there and entertaining the rest of us, I don't see what the big deal is??


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## BastrdSonOfElvis (Mar 24, 2005)

Righteous...gleaming the toob. Toob on, brothers..toob on.


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## WhiteLightning (Apr 21, 2004)

I heard a story once about a tuber who put a pony keg in a tube next to his tube. He tied a rope or strap or something to the keg, other end to his ankle so it wouldn't float away. I also heard that the tube flipped on a wave or something, and said tuber sank to the bottom tied to his pony keg.

Truth or (not so) urban myth?

You be the judge, but unless pony kegs float, I would be willing to bet one of Newby's friends was in on that one.


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## newby0616 (Jun 16, 2005)

Oh c'mon, WL:
Basic toober algebraics pretty much dictate the only way to use a keg as a floatation device is to make sure you funnel beer at such a rate that air volume always exceeds malt liquor volume inside its container....

If that pony keg WASN'T floating by the time said tuber made it to the end of the river, you can damn well bet this incident took place somewhere out on/ near the FRONT RANGE, and not in **our** neck of the woods. NO self-respecting southeastern ******* toober worth his water wings would've EVER left that much alcohol untouched!


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## WhiteLightning (Apr 21, 2004)

This is true, unless said keg of Bush Light was the RESERVE keg...


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