# His Wife Said That He Had Better Stop Swimming in Class III



## RiverWrangler (Oct 14, 2003)

A friend of mine is looking for a place to step it down a notch and practice his roll after swimming near the Ouzel Picnic Area on Lower Mish. He had to hike-out because he wasn't sure if Poudre Park was for him considering he swam on Bridges the day before, so I think he's really just looking to take it down a notch. His wife was so embarrassed for him that she went out on the town without him and was seen making out with a local MC. Needless to say he slept on the couch and was told that if he didn't stop carping he was going to be sleeping there permanently. 

I won't say his name but his Mountainbuzz moniker rhymes with carping otter and has something to do with lots of h2o. So do you guys think he's going to be alright on Filter Plant, or is Mad Dog going to be a little rough for him at these levels? Maybe he could put-in right below the Frothing Chihuahua?

I also heard that Keck, Maria, and posse had a swim each on the Source and that they might be looking to get back into it at the Golden Play Park. Maybe step it up to Boulder Creek through town if they're feeling up to it. Oh, and can someone who was there explain to me how FR Fred managed to swim three times on one Source lap. That is remarkable! Something that I had never imagined possible!

My beat down is coming , I know (or maybe I already got mine, twice, in Upper Narrows)...

but this was too epic of a carnage report not to pass on to the general public.


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## Dave Frank (Oct 14, 2003)

Thanks so much for sharing!


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## FLOWTORCH (Mar 5, 2004)




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## Snowhere (Feb 21, 2008)

*BLOW FTW!*

Was the blow up doll ^ the swimmer, or the PFD!


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## GAtoCSU (Apr 18, 2005)

Snowhere said:


> Was the blow up doll ^ the swimmer, or the PFD!


It was trying to help one of the competitors with his roll.


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## ToddG (Nov 29, 2003)

Snowhere said:


> Was the blow up doll ^ the swimmer, or the PFD!


Looks like Leif's mom to me ..

Am I wrong?


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## holley (Mar 8, 2004)

RiverWrangler said:


> I won't say his name but his Mountainbuzz moniker rhymes with carping otter and has something to do with lots of h2o. So do you guys think he's going to be alright on Filter Plant, or is Mad Dog going to be a little rough for him at these levels? Maybe he could put-in right below the Frothing Chihuahua?


Oh good! Maybe I'll have someone to paddle with when I get back from NZ.



RiverWrangler said:


> His wife was so embarrassed for him that she went out on the town without him and was seen making out with a local MC. Needless to say he slept on the couch and was told that if he didn't stop carping he was going to be sleeping there permanently.


Glad to hear Maija still has her standards!! Love it. Thanks for the in-depth investigative reporting, Evan. Makes me feel like I'm still at home.

Heard about lots of high-water beatdowns from this end of the world...tried not to laugh about it though, because I imagine my number's coming up pretty soon. OK well...that story JenK told me about our two friends (whose names start with the same letter and who share a birthday) R2'ing Pineview and getting surfed and tossed around in the hole...OK, yeah, I laughed about that. Kind of a lot, actually. Nice job pulling it out of the hole, Scout. And sending your hubby on a swim for me...I owed him one. :wink:


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## boof512 (Oct 26, 2003)

I was given this news yesterday right as I put on the Big T. I was understandably upset, it was like hearing one of my buddies had stopped being a kayaker and taken up golf or something. This is really tragic; for one simple reason that I realized as I was getting worked in a whole yesterday. 
So there I am about to get handed on a class 4 stretch of water in a class 5 hole with no really eddy to rescue for ohh say a mile.. One might wonder what my first thought is.. Well I will tell you what it was; if Peter "strongswimmer" swam on class 3 then it must be OK for me to pull in this hole. And there in lies the problem. When one of your buddies swims on something like that it makes the rest of his friends feel like it is also OK to swim..His swim has the potential to bring us all down.
However I hope we can all do as I did and say " f#$%# you to the swim gods and do what ever you can do to get out of your personal hole. 
"stongswimmer" if you need a place to crash while you are learning to roll I have an extra room.
Good luck out there and be safe
Patrick


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## Gary E (Oct 27, 2003)

I also get a call yesterday from Forrest. He is yelling at me to come home. He needs his whole crew back. He couldn't believe what he saw, as FRF swims 3 times in one mile. "How do you even gather your shit up twice in a mile to swim 3 times" Forrest says. "These kids are suppose to be better then us" It was a shit show! I cannot stop laughing as I think, wow Fred? Keck, I get it. Maria, sounds like shes getting after it. Who else got their ticket punched in there? Why is the source crushing young souls? 

Glad everyone is safe and getting out there. I think we should have a source swimmers race on boulder creek when the flow comes down to a manageable level. We can invite the buzzards and all work on our river dressing, whistles, ropes and z set ups. Trevor can helmet cam the action, right before he swims.

Mad dog is way too high right now Evan, you trying to get someone killed?

Gary

ps-where is mad dog?


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## kayakfreakus (Mar 3, 2006)

Mad Dog = burliest rapid on the filter plant stretch of poudre


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## Timmy (Oct 12, 2003)

Lotsah20, come visit me in Durango. There are therapy groups down here for guys like us. It is a good place to share feelings and work on the problems we have. There people down here that can help. I'm worried about you. From a friend to a friend, please come visit me so we can work on our kayaking problems together. 

timmyt


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## JJH (Oct 14, 2003)

Lotsa don't worry. If he can get his mojo back, so can you...


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## ToddG (Nov 29, 2003)

Word on the street is LIL film crew was on hand for all of Lotsa's eddy swimming shenanigans. 

If true, then is there documentation of the flailing? And will it be included in the Fall '08 edit of LIL? 

Questions that need answers ..


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## RiverWrangler (Oct 14, 2003)

TG, I think he may have been wearing your cravat during the run and it might have gotten tangled, holding his head up, not allowing him to roll properly. I think. As far as the footage goes look for it in the upcoming Rocky Mountain state series LVM. It was huge in there. I think some raft guides may have swam on that same section as well. Look to the post about the lost guide stick.


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## ToddG (Nov 29, 2003)

RiverWrangler said:


> TG, I think he may have been wearing your cravat during the run and it might have gotten tangled, holding his head up, not allowing him to roll properly.












I want it back. Seriously dude, send me my awesome cravat.


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## yourrealdad (May 25, 2004)

I was wondering why I am not getting any phone calls back to run the shit. Next time I will text you all "Pool session". I know some hot lil filly lifeguards that can give some mouth to mouth if you miss your third roll. (Revenge for having your wife make out with an MC).

Seriously you guys are missing running class V to swim class III? I feel like I am in the twilight zone.

Anyone up for a 4ft. Narrows run? I now have no fear cause I would rather swim whiteline than Pissed off pitbull. ( I am serious, the lines look clean. At least hold a rope for me)


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## JCKeck1 (Oct 28, 2003)

Whatever Gary, word on the street down south is that you've been swimming in a high water Brown's canyon style wave train up there. Is that the crew Forrest is looking to get back (don't forget he has a pink helmet now...)

Evan, I have no reply, except that the source is calling your name. I'll see you up there next week or does baby duty get more intense as the water comes up?
Joe


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## Force (Apr 27, 2004)

I wouldn't have believed it if I hadn't seen it for myself. Narry I still really didn't believe it after I saw it. Granted swim1 -poudre park was pretty intimidating that night; swim2 and subsequent t rescue- lower mish was huge.

Now I hear of the keck meister, marria, and FFR 3 times in one run. Man look what lotsa has started.


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## Gary E (Oct 27, 2003)

Keck, you wouldn't even drive by and look from the road at what I swam in. But I did do some swimmin, no doubt. 

G


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## JCKeck1 (Oct 28, 2003)

Seriously, it was road side?
Joe


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