# I have a dumbass question...



## NolsGuy (Jul 20, 2009)

Define "booty beer" and the rules for said beer of booty. 

I want to make sure I'm following these types of things to the letter. 

Thanks in advance, 

Bill


----------



## goldcamp (Aug 9, 2006)

You swim involuntarily and you must drink a beer from your or someone elses booty.


----------



## freexbiker (Jul 18, 2005)

you unintentionally have an out of boat experience where you may put yourself or others in danger...


You DRINK from your booty

Somebody else saves you or any of your gear...


You DRINK from their booty


----------



## kayakfreakus (Mar 3, 2006)

If you swim you pour a beverage (preferably alcoholic) into a river shoe used on the trip and drink it.

Some people seem to have rules about whose booty gets used, what beverage, but I feel if you follow the simple procedure above you have covered your ass if you feel its necessary (hotly debated topic lately).......


----------



## GoodTimes (Mar 9, 2006)

swim...raft or kayak...pour entire beer in booty at first opportunity...slam it.

Retarded......charma will not bite you if you refrain

Things charma WILL bit you for:

1. Stealing someone's gear
2. Being a jackass on the water and not understanding common courtesies.
3. Saying "watch this shit" or "follow my line"
4. Talking shit to the river....in any way.
5. Lacking respect for her...
6. Being a general know-it-all, I'm too good for this shit, not friendly asshole.

Charma, she'll get ya.....but not for declining drinking a beer in the parking lot out of your funkness that is the booty.


----------



## Andy H. (Oct 13, 2003)

Its a way kayakers discovered to make Milwaukee's Best taste better, right?


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

It sure makes pbr taste better with out having to use twang
good times how can you beleive in karma and turn down the sacrificial lamb that is the booty beer?


----------



## restrac2000 (Mar 6, 2008)

Thats just plain narsty. No way, no how.


----------



## mikekeown (Mar 18, 2005)

Good Times its spelled karma. Drink your booty beer.


----------



## rwhyman (May 23, 2005)

Is charma related to karma?


----------



## SqEarly (May 3, 2009)

If you fail to "square up" with the river gods before your next boating opportunity it could be your last. For those who have not bootied when bootying is deserved, it is said that they will suffer serious punishment. And because all of said river God's communicate on a regular bases your next boating experience could be your last. 

Always bring beer or whisky to avoid the wrath of the only proven higher spirits, The River Gods!


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

wtf is narsty?


----------



## GoodTimes (Mar 9, 2006)

Whoops.........Karma.....thanks.

Not doing it...


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

karma is pissed you didn't spell it correctly therefor you owe a booty beer. how can you beleive in something you can't spell?


----------



## GoodTimes (Mar 9, 2006)

caspermike said:


> karma is pissed you didn't spell it correctly therefor you owe a booty beer. how can you beleive in something you can't spell?


 
Yeah, I'm going to take criticism from YOU on spelling, that's classic.


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

[edit] New Age and Theosophy


The idea of karma was popularized in the Western world through the work of the Theosophical Society. Kardecist and Western New Age reinterpretations of karma frequently cast it as a sort of luck associated with virtue: if one does good or spiritually valuable acts, one deserves and can expect good luck; conversely, if one does harmful things, one can expect bad luck or unfortunate happenings.[citation needed] In this conception, karma is affiliated with the Neopagan law of return or Threefold Law, the idea that the beneficial or harmful effects one has on the world will return to oneself. Colloquially this may be summed up as 'what goes around comes around.'
There is also the metaphysical idea that, because karma is a force of nature and not a sentient creature capable of making value judgments, karma isn't about good and evil deeds, because applying those labels would be judgmental, but that it is about positive and negative energy, where negative energy can include things not seen as "being bad" like sadness and fear, and positive energy can be caused by being creative and solving problems as well as by exuding love and doing virtuous acts.[citation needed]It is referred to as "omniverse karma" or "omni-karma"[citation needed] because it requires the existence of an omniverse, that space that contains all possible universes. The omniverse idea includes concepts such as souls, psychic energy, synchronicity (a concept originally from psychoanalyst Carl Jung, which says that things that happen at the same time are related), and ideas from quantum or theoretical physics.


the Booty Beer! anyone who fails to maintain composer in a planned situtaion which in the event of a swim or any exiting of craft has to drink a booty beer for the benefit of ones karma or face the wrath from the almighty! those that do not drink immediately after said unplanned event shall be subject to unavoidable carnage! drink you booty beers!

from wiki! on Karma and the booty beer. 
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karma

btw its on the site!


----------



## cosurfgod (Oct 10, 2003)

*Booty Beer*

-A booty must be drank for an unintentional swim. It's a fun tradition and of course rafter don't understand, they are scared pussies, look at there craft.

-If you do not drink your booty nothing happens, you are just a douche. I do not believe in karma, seems like santa clause to me.

-It can be any booty, yours, your buddy....

-People who are learning do not have to drink booty beers. They will know when it is time and will be happy to join this great tradition.

-When paddling internationally you can adjust the rule. We drank out of our helmets in Chile and Mexico. Suprisingly gross.

-If you are floating around with your skirt popped off and your buddy floats by and flips you, you do not have to drink a booty, as this is not an error on your part. (This one is highly debated)

These are my booty beliefs, I do not play any stupid front ranger ice cream game.

PS- As the great Wayne Chorter and Chunderboy believe, Mountainbuzz is FOR talking shit, so pipe down tool bag rafters and your gear talk.


----------



## rwhyman (May 23, 2005)

caspermike said:


> karma is pissed you didn't spell it correctly therefor you owe a booty beer. how can you beleive in something you can't spell?


Beleive is spelled believe.

Looks like you need to do a booty beer


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

you obviously didn't read you must be the new grammar nazi, hal rwhyman


----------



## rwhyman (May 23, 2005)

caspermike said:


> you obviously didn't read you must be the new grammar nazi, hal rwhyman


I already have a full time job, don't have time for another.

And that would be "Hail" rwhyman


----------



## brendodendo (Jul 18, 2004)

I'm a rafter. In that sense > Me = DB.

The idea behind this misunderstood ritual, is that after you drink one, you do not want to drink another and therefore DO NOT SWIM. 

Good Times, I don't know you, at least I don't think we have met, but, as a solid rafter, I'm sure that you put yourself into various situations that cause you to fall out of your boat. Be it a flip, dump truck or just falling out the back. I believe this ritual is to make sure that you are on top of your game while on the river. You can shun it, and I have no problem with that, but it's also a respect thing. I do it to make sure I am on my A game the next time I go raft. 

CarveDog .. did you have a bad booty beer experience? You seem REALLY hostile toward the notion.


*DRINK YOUR BOOTY BEER* and at least try to enjoy it


----------



## mr. compassionate (Jan 13, 2006)

the Booty Beer! anyone who fails to maintain composer in a planned situtaion which in the event of a swim or any exiting of craft has to drink a booty beer for the benefit of ones karma or face the wrath from the almighty! those that do not drink immediately after said unplanned event shall be subject to unavoidable carnage! drink you booty beers!

from wiki! on Karma and the booty beer. 
Karma - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

btw its on the site![/quote]


Sorry mike but you brought it up...spelling...what's composer?


----------



## Don (Oct 16, 2003)

*Watch TGR*

If you want to see where the idea came from watch Valhalla one of the old TGR kayaking flicks. The MT crews started doing it first, got it on film and now everyone thinks they need to do it.

It beats what we did in the old days: build a mini kayak out of drift wood, set it on fire, and toss it in the river as a sacrafice to the river gods. Who has that much free time?

I've been boating for close to 20 years and have never drank out of my shoes. I never will... it's dumb. If you into frats than I guess it beats spanking each other with wooden paddles. If you feel the need for more pear pressure. Go for it.


----------



## GoodTimes (Mar 9, 2006)

brendodendo said:


> Good Times, I don't know you, at least I don't think we have met, but, as a solid rafter, I'm sure that you put yourself into various situations that cause you to fall out of your boat. Be it a flip, dump truck or just falling out the back. I believe this ritual is to make sure that you are on top of your game while on the river. You can shun it, and I have no problem with that, but it's also a respect thing. I do it to make sure I am on my A game the next time I go rafting.
> 
> 
> *DRINK YOUR BOOTY BEER*


Alright, alright....since you kinda called me out on the subject I'll express my disdain and lack of finding ANY correlation between KARMA and booty beer boatin'....be it yakin' or rubber pushin'.

Maybe I'm a decent paddler/oarsperson/paddleguide....maybe I'm really lucky..... probably more the latter. I've been rowin rafts since I was strong enough to hold em....LONG before this silly booty beer thing came about....hell, I was WAY too young to drink them then anyway. Even when I started kayaking 13 seasons ago....I don't remember the booty beer thing....never done one...don't intend too.

I haven't been running sissy shit over the course of my years.....hence my thought that mamma river has been nice to me.....I'll get mine....but it's not going to be because I didn't drink a beer out of my nasty ass booty.

NO WAY am I going to boast about and/or even mention how many times I've fallen out of a raft, flipped a raft, lost a custie, or swam from my kayak. Its my personal belief that mamma river is listening....and it'll show disrespect if I do. She doesn't give a shit about beer.....except if you fail to secure your drag-bag well enough and/or scrape a rock and leave a case in her belly. She might get pissed about that......


----------



## yourrealdad (May 25, 2004)

Will everyone please go to caspermike's wiki post and look at the edited by Andy H at the very bottom. Classic. Mike, I love you even if you can't spell. And that is platonic love between two grown men, not San Fran love.


----------



## skibuminwyo (Nov 8, 2005)

So much flame... Wow.


----------



## NolsGuy (Jul 20, 2009)

Ok, this was helpful...

Next question...since rafters don't often wear booties...what is the alternative to drink out of....tho I'm sure I'll be sorry I asked.


----------



## adgeiser (May 26, 2009)

kayakfreakus said:


> If you swim you pour a beverage (preferably alcoholic) into a river shoe used on the trip and drink it.
> 
> Some people seem to have rules about whose booty gets used, what beverage, but I feel if you follow the simple procedure above you have covered your ass if you feel its necessary (hotly debated topic lately).......


OHH!!! The river shoe Booty!!!! .....That's why everybody has been looking at me so weird... I thought we were using the Other Booty...my bad


----------



## Andy H. (Oct 13, 2003)

NolsGuy said:


> Ok, this was helpful...
> 
> Next question...since rafters don't often wear booties...what is the alternative to drink out of....tho I'm sure I'll be sorry I asked.


A beer can.


----------



## caverdan (Aug 27, 2004)

Andy H. said:


> A beer can.


.......mug....cup.....or bottle.

We only watch booty beer being drunk.......and pay other boaters in beer fines when deemed necessary. :wink: :mrgreen:


----------



## carvedog (May 11, 2005)

brendodendo said:


> I'm a rafter. In that sense > Me = DB.
> 
> CarveDog .. did you have a bad booty beer experience? You seem REALLY hostile toward the notion.



So here I am just reading an amusing thread about people who drink funk and seem to like it, when I get called out when I haven't posted in the aforementioned thread. And I had no intention of posting here, preferring to give those who worship the booty their own thread. 

No brendo I haven't had a bad booty experience. I love to give these guys shit as I think it's pretty funny. Has more to do with not worshiping false idols for me. There is only one God and the river is a wonderful metaphor for God, but the river doesn't have vengance flowing through it's waters. We are kind of beyond that old testament stuff now. 

The other thread was about rafting sucks so the kayakers start calling the rafters pansies and then you have a good old fashioned flame war, which since I have my own special set of nomex fireproof underwear ( with extra big ball sack area ), I am not afraid of. 

What's even more ridonkulous is that some of those guys seem to think that me not drinking the boot would be reason to not boat with me. 
This strikes me as incredibly immature to not respect others beliefs or lack of. I travelled overseas for about 8 years and lived in several different cultures and learned tolerance for other's beliefs from that.

So I don't care if you do the boot. I will laugh and take pictures while you do. But I won't - not as much because of the stank boot funk taste as I have a cast iron constitution. But because I don't believe in a vengeful river.

It's a bit like the emails that come in that say if you don't send this to ten people in ten minutes you will have ten years of bad luck. I gleefully delete these threatening missives as soon as they appear with not another thought. 

Thanks for asking brendo. Peace to the booty drinkers.


----------



## NolsGuy (Jul 20, 2009)

caverdan said:


> .......mug....cup.....or bottle.


Cool, I can do that. The other just sounds...well...icky.


----------



## Riparian (Feb 7, 2009)

The whole booty beer ritual amuses me. Is it weird superstition or just "Look how badass I am, I drink my own foot funk"? Either way, I'm not playing. I enjoy beer, not nasty foot stank. Apparently to some I'm a lesser man for it... which is pretty hilarious.


----------



## latenightjoneser (Feb 6, 2004)

Don, 

Please edit your post. Not only is your post embarassing, but it offends those of us who sought/received advice from you over the years. You should have disclosed this a long time ago.


----------



## Don (Oct 16, 2003)

*AM*

Mayo! When I need a lawer you are on the top of my list. 

And I often paddle bare foot.


----------



## BoilermakerU (Mar 13, 2009)

Riparian said:


> The whole booty beer ritual amuses me. Is it weird superstition or just "Look how badass I am, I drink my own foot funk"? Either way, I'm not playing. I enjoy beer, not nasty foot stank. Apparently to some I'm a lesser man for it... which is pretty hilarious.


Ditto.

And thankfully, nobody I raft with wears booties...


----------



## LiquidGuy87 (Aug 22, 2006)

I won't paddle anymore with people who don't paticipate in bootie beers... it has become more than a tradition... I have seen some serious carnage take place (for a second time, and in close proximity) to paddlers who don't give up the bootie.

If you raft, feel free to not participate... I don't like paddling with you anyways. 

PS Casper... I heard about the sweeeet style you took your bootie at the Gnarrows. Not a drop missed. In my book, it makes up for all of your spelling typos over the years. Nice.

Are my sentences complete?


----------



## carvedog (May 11, 2005)

LiquidGuy87 said:


> Are my sentences completely stupid?


Fixed it for you. 

Yes.


----------



## lhowemt (Apr 5, 2007)

carvedog said:


> Fixed it for you.
> 
> Yes.


Priceless!!


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

Mike, brother time to hit some bluegrass. you even around the fort. 

as being someonith who attemptedth to skipth thy bootie beer and than havith got a kayak stolen thee ver next day have no other choice but to beleive very strongly in thy tradition o cleansing o thy soul by thy form o the Bootie Beer. like yea or nee, the bootie is thy savior, thee River "Gods" aren't demanding thy end just for yee to drink thy bootie for thy swims that yah dost though indanger thy brothers. Drink up Happly for thoust be regiving soul and solid lines!

boofith amd releasith!


----------



## Palo Duro (Jun 12, 2009)

Is it possible to rename this tradition, to say, boobie or booty-beer? 

I am assuming if you dont crash and burn, you sample the foot-joy broth, correct?

Of course, needed is a well rounded young lady, with a reasonable sense of humor.

Just sayin,,,


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

what the hell are you talking about "if you don't crash and burn, you sample the foot joy broth"? you are a fucking idiot shamin the bootie beer and you don't even know what it is! man wayith ovar ye headith. 

you drink if you swim which inherentely risks your brother lives. you read the post above at all? you no like drink, you no swim.


----------



## Palo Duro (Jun 12, 2009)

I see, senor masta, I am a Dumbth-MF.
So if you hit the water a-runnin and everone crashes but you, everyone drinks from thee shoe?
If thee picks up everyone gear,from the river, everyone drinks from thee's shoe?
If thee saves girlfriend,, dose girlfriend drink from thee's shoe also?


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

man its pretty simple to understand. "if you swim you drink." if you exit your boat as in a unplanned situation you drink. ice cream rule applies to rolls. most rolls buys ice cream for the group. but if you swim you drink and buy ice cream for you group. all rules apply equally to both sexs, so if your gf swims you make her drink the bootie to.


----------



## Palo Duro (Jun 12, 2009)

I understand, you swim you drink, right.

The whole idea is to stay in your boat and not swim, right?


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

SI SENOR


----------



## Palo Duro (Jun 12, 2009)

Well, hell fire, my bother. Should'nt there be a sweet reward for that?

Stayin it thee boat?:shock:


----------



## caspermike (Mar 9, 2007)

Yeah its ice cream from the person who rolls or swims the most if you roll the most to bad for you you buy next time you better not roll, you catching on yet? there's a reward system if you can see it.


----------



## Palo Duro (Jun 12, 2009)

Got it, out of the boat, you drink to booty-beer. 
In the boat you get ice cream, from out of the boat folks.

Do you drink the booty-beer yourself or dose a curvy, well adjusted, rounded lady help with this process?


----------



## mr. compassionate (Jan 13, 2006)

caspermike said:


> Yeah its ice cream from the person who rolls or swims the most if you roll the most to bad for you you buy next time you better not roll, you catching on yet? there's a reward system if you can see it.


Wow, until you mentioned it Mike I never saw the positive/negative reward system! Brilliant, did you make this up?


----------



## Palo Duro (Jun 12, 2009)

Senor Mike, Have you been boot-y-Funk-in with me,, is this true, bible stuff, you are masklating?


----------



## montanamusher (May 4, 2007)

Don't forget...an important part of the ritual is to group sing the "Drink Mother F_ckr" song while the swimmer slams there booty beer.

Who knows the song???

I'll start it.

Here's to brother ________


----------



## craporadon (Feb 27, 2006)

It's no wonder u don't drink booties Don, because u don't kayak anymore. I drank my 1st bootie in 1992 because the old timers said it was the rule. By the way 1992 was 7 years before TGR made a kayak movie so that theory is out the window. Pretty much the main reason to drink a bootie now is because you look like a complete Douchebag turning one down.


----------



## montanamusher (May 4, 2007)

craporadon said:


> It's no wonder u don't drink booties Don, because u don't kayak anymore. I drank my 1st bootie in 1992 because the old timers said it was the rule. By the way 1992 was 7 years before TGR made a kayak movie so that theory is out the window. Pretty much the main reason to drink a bootie now is because you look like a complete Douchebag turning one down.


The nurps didn't invent the tradition, but there is no doubt they popularized it...


----------

